I was born an unfinished question in a house of ready‑made replies.
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They dressed me in their hand‑me‑down whys.
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The TV told me who to be before I knew my own first name.
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I memorized the script and called it “my” acclaim.
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Teachers drew straight lines where my thoughts tried to bend and roam.
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I learned to color in their boxes and called that “home.”
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The preacher thundered doctrines while my doubts sat shivering in the pew.
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I nodded like a bobblehead and called it “true.”
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Friends passed around opinions like a vape we all inhaled.
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We coughed out second‑hand convictions, then exhaled.
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My phone kept buzzing, “Here’s your tribe, just click agree.”
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It sold me mass‑produced rebellion labeled “me.”
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I wore my curated quirks like a neon crown of thorns.
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Still cried at night because I felt like one more clone in uniform.
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I posted “live your truth” with filters hiding half my face.
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Then wondered why my heart still felt out of place.
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Some days I preached free will while running on a leash of fear.
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I called it “God’s will” or “the algorithm,” both unclear.
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I mocked the sheep while checking where the loudest crowd would go.
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My “independent thinking” followed every trending flow.
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At last the joke grew loud enough to wake me from the dream.
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I saw ten different cages painted “self‑esteem.”
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I started asking who gets rich when I erase my doubt.
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And who gets nervous when I finally opt‑out.
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Individuality arrived not with a scream but with a sigh.
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A small, embarrassed “no” that would not die.
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It wasn’t fireworks, tattoos, or moving to a foreign shore.
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It was owning how my yes and no had bent before.
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I felt the panic: lose the tribe and you will surely disappear.
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Yet every honest word drew one real person near.
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I saw my parents’ frightened eyes inside the rules they taught.
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Their love and their indoctrinated fear were strangely wrought.
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I saw my faith was half alive, half armor wrapped in pain.
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I let a little silence fall between the prayers I’d chant by rote again.
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Now I walk this narrow hallway between “belong” and “be.”
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Some doors are locked by them, some quietly by me.
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The comedy is this: I stay a messy social creature to the bone.
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Yet every step toward being real leaves me less alone.
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I won’t be perfectly unique, some mythic island free of tide.
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Just one more haunted, laughing human who stopped completely running from inside.
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If there is any holy act in this bewildered, wired nation’s role.
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It’s signing your own name beneath the script—and then rewriting it in soul.

…

DCG