I Paint the Sky

Milan Cemetery, Italy:


I paint the sky with the colors my eyes can and cannot see

I speak the words that voice the narrative my mind can and cannot hear

I touch the world with textures my skin can and cannot feel

I seek to know how the world becomes the canvas of our creation



This is why human beings find it difficult to learn and adapt to new situations: because we are always looking for precedence, for authority from the past on what we’re supposed to do now.  And that gives us the impression that the past is all-important.

–Alan Watts

And thus we create stories that we would like to be true

The world is a place that has many eventualities

All of which only some will come to pass

Looking back we may not like what we have done or like the outcomes which imposes friction on our memories.  On our past reflections we can often miscalculate the honesty at which we have behaved in past events.  There are mechanisms that are theorized in psychology to prevent trauma in our thinking thus our remembrances of such events may be subjected to defensive measures when cognitive dissonance intercedes.

Our memories are subject to other features of our consciousness that intervene the processing of these memories.  The question of how one remembers truthfully is and can be problematic.  We can dismiss all content if indeed we do not give it a second thought, but if you are built like me, than you would want to strip down important memories that require some discernment.  What makes us honest if and when we take notice of our deeds, and view them every night or day upon our reflection.  If we do not neglect our accountability to ourselves, than we may be consistent in our reflections of the moments we remember.  If we do not make it a habit to review our behavior with any credence, than we leave ourselves subject to faulty remembrances.

There are many circumstances that may play a part in our memories.

  • Confabulation
  • Psychological impediments
  • inaccurate accounts of what actually happened
  • Distortion and dishonest projections, introjections
  • Defense Mechanisms
  • altered admissions of our rewriting our cognition’s


Think about your fifth-birthday party. Maybe your mom carried the cake. What did her face look like? If you have a hard time imagining the way she looked then rather than how she looks now, you’re not alone.

The brain edits memories relentlessly, updating the past with new information. Scientists say that this isn’t a question of having a bad memory. Instead, they think the brain updates memories to make them more relevant and useful now — even if they’re not a true representation of the past.

To figure this out, researchers at Northwestern University asked 17 people to look at images of a scene, like a beach or a farm, with a small object like an apple layered on top. They were then shown a scene with the object in a new location. Then they were asked to move the object to its location in in the first picture. They always got it wrong.

The researchers used scenes like this to test memory.  When an object’s location and a background scene are presented together, they are remembered as a whole event (top). But when new information is presented, like a new location for the small object, that new location is tied to the old scene (bottom).

Courtesy Donna Jo Bridge and Joel Voss

Finally the participants were shown the original scene, with the apple in three places: the original location, the second or a brand-new one. They always picked the second, updated location.

“Their memory from the original location has been overwritten,” says Joel Voss, an assistant professor of neuroscience at Northwestern. “It’s taken that new location and stuck it to the original photograph.”

This is a contrived laboratory setting, Voss tells Shots, so it’s not guaranteed that the brain is taking current events in your life and stuffing them into your past. But the researchers had people do the experiment while observing their brain with a special MRI scanner.

The brain structure that the people in this experiment were using when they were rewriting their memories, the hippocampus, is very involved in autobiographical memory. “It’s essentially as if the hippocampus doesn’t care if it’s putting together two new things,” Voss says.

The findings were published Wednesday in the Journal of Neuroscience.

Voss and his co-author Donna Bridge tested the participants’ memory of the original image, and they remembered it very well. So this wasn’t a case of bad memory overall. It wasn’t until they were asked to move the object and place it in the original spot that the memories changed.

“Our memories aren’t perfect,” Voss says. “They’re not like tape recorders. There’s a small current of thought that thinks these failures aren’t necessarily a bad thing. Memory is not intended to allow you to remember what you did last week, or remember your childhood. The point is to help you make good choices right now.”

It can be disturbing to realize that cherished memories may not be true, Voss agrees. But plenty of other studies have shown that memories are indeed often faulty. This doesn’t keep you from recalling memories and treasuring them, Voss says. “But they might not be perfectly accurate.”

And some things are worth forgetting. Voss, for one, is fine not remembering his father’s 1980s mustache. “And the half-mullet,” he says.


Our Brains Rewrite Our Memories, Putting Present In The Past     ~~Nancy Shute

So can we really judge if we are who we think we believe we are?  We can only do the best we can do!  I think that we must follow our hearts, and if we are to make our amends, then we should be doing good deeds to pay it forward.  We may not be who we think we really are.  I look at you all…..


I look at you all see the love there that’s sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
I look at the floor and I see it needs sweeping
Still my guitar gently weeps
I don’t know how nobody told you how to unfold your love
I don’t know how someone controlled you
They bought and sold you
I look at the world and I notice it’s turning
While my guitar gently weeps
With every mistake we must surely be learning
Still my guitar gently weeps
I don’t know how you were diverted
You were perverted too
I don’t know how you were inverted
No one alerted you.
I look at you all I see the love there that’s sleeping
While my guitar gently weeps
Look at you all
Still my guitar gently weeps

~~George Harrison

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