Limerence 


I write to you from inside the storm,
and from the doorway where I watch it form.
I have loved you mostly inside my head,
a theater of scenes that never get said.
You appear, then vanish, a flickering sign,
and my heart runs after what is never quite mine.
I call this love, but it burns like a fever,
a vow to a ghost and a distant believer.
I rewind small moments until they all blur,
a glance, a breath, the way you never were.
You stay perfected, framed in my mind,
and I fade smaller just to keep you kind.
I have abandoned myself chasing your name,
walking over glass while calling it flame.
Each silence from you becomes a loud judge,
each crumb of regard, a banquet I won’t budge.
Your armor is heavy, your doors stay closed tight,
yet I camp at the gate, praying you’ll turn toward the light.
You retreat into distance, I rush into fire,
thinking if I burn enough, you’ll feel desire.
I have studied our pattern like scripture and code,
watched it etch scars in my nervous road.
You step back whenever I try to draw near,
and I step in closer every time you disappear.
The gap between us is more than just space,
it’s all of my effort poured into your grace.
Now a new voice trembles under my skin,
asking why I keep losing myself to not win.
It tells me love is not meant as a chase,
not an endless exam I must constantly ace.
It whispers my worth is older than you,
that my pulse didn’t start when you came into view.
So I gather my pieces from altars and floors,
and start closing shrines with your name on their doors.
I turn these letters inward for the first time,
writing truth to the self I left out in the grime.
I step back, not to wound or accuse,
but to finally stop making myself the one I lose.
I still ache, I still want, I still remember your face,
yet the fantasy no longer gets to set the pace.
I walk away on unsteady, unfamiliar legs,
carrying both my longing and unanswered begs.
Somewhere beyond this unfinished, jagged bend,
something real may rise—if I dare not write the end.

RSP

DCG

Screenshot

The Archer and the Crab

I wasn’t looking

But then you came upon me

I didn’t expect what would happen

Somehow my heart is now full of glee

Maybe I was receptive?

Maybe I was under a spell?

But unlike anyone before

It was only you that I fell

You the Sagittarius

Shot me with Cupid’s arrow

The Archer and the Crab

What-do-ya-know?

I don’t think I’m crazy

What’s a poor boy to do?

I found love

I found it with you

I care deeply

Listen to what the heart will say

Having you in my life

I know now God has listened to me pray

I want only to make you happy

I’ll work hard to show you everyday

The passion we bring to each other

The passion that won’t fade away

DCG

And So I Say this to You

This passion in my heart that burns so deep

You’ve touched my soul

And for this I weep

These tears of joy

You’ve brought to my eyes

No longer alone

My heart no longer disguised

You can search in a lifetime

And never meet that special one

Too often we are distracted

The wrong timing

Things never get done

I heard you laughing

And that’s when I knew

I want that laugh in my life

And so I say this to you

You are my muse

The one I revere

The one I feel closest to

Carino, my dear

It’s when I hold you and kiss you

When our hearts connect

Our hearts have bonded

Our hearts intersect

DCG

The Many Things I Love about You

Your hands are soft

Like a velvet glove

The laughter you give

Are the things I write of

You have a warm heart

You sometimes will shield

You remain strong

But only in love will you yield

The smile of an angel

Will look upon my face

The eyes deeply expressing

To me what you embrace

From different worlds

That we might be

Are still but the same

For you and me

Your hair is radiant

Giving shimmer and shine

I want only to caress it

In these hands of mine

The words that you speak

Have me under a spell

The voice that I love

Makes my heart swell

The many things I love about you

I have yet to learn

I keep my heart open

And save them in turn

DCG

You Can Trust in your Heart

My heart is singing

When you are near

And when our eyes meet

A smile will appear

I can honestly say

You are very special

There is no one else

That makes me feel this way

I love getting to know you

It is your company I have much affection

And with every moment I spend time with you

I feel an interconnection

You can trust in your heart

Place it in my hand

I will nourish and protect it

Your heart I know with me will expand

DCG

Perhaps it’s Cupid’s Arrow

Because of the joy

You bring to me

My heart is open

I’m more able to see

A beautiful world

That surrounds me

I cherish these moments

And what might be

With every new day

I am thankful and blessed

A part of my life

In you I invest

A whole new world

Has opened up to me

When once I was blind

‘Tis only now that I see

It matters not

Whether it’s God, karma, or fate

To you I always

Seem to gravitate

Call it magnetism

Attraction, connected

Or all the above

Could it be more?

Something we call love?

Maybe we can find out

Where this will lead

Will you take my hand?

Are you willing to proceed?

Perhaps it’s Cupid’s arrow?

That’s got the better of me

Are you curious to find out?

Are you willing to see?

DCG

Your Tarot Card

You like me

I like you

So why don’t we –

Rendezvous

Love your smile

Love your eyes

You know by now

That it’s no surprise

The best kind of song

That one can sing

The song from the heart

It’s a beautiful thing

I like your company

What you bring

Our conversations

The little things

You like me

I like you

So why don’t we –

Rendezvous

I’d like to think

We go together

There’s something about us

That’s on a tether

You might say

I’m into you

I like the idea

The idea of two

Tell me miss V

Are up up for it?

I know it’s real

No need for counterfeit

Just let me in

Let down your guard

Let me be

Your tarot card

DCG

Tap the Fire in my Soul

Inspire me to become better

Tap the fire in my soul

Unleash my potential

This has always been a goal

But for me you make it easy

I’m touched and I tell you in this way

I am thankful for your influence

I am a better man than I was yesterday

I embrace these gifts

Lavish me in splendor

The scent of your hair and the touch of your skin

Makes my heart tender

I am truly blessed

My outlook in life

I greet my opportunities

I discard my strife

I welcome the Day

And what I can bring

What I can provide

An emotional wellspring

DCG

WikiPsalm #Nine

What is most beautiful?

My answer is beyond what is seen

Behind what is visible

‘Tis but the soul that will intervene

Love that is stronger

Than what is skin deep

Lies within the human spirit

The essence that brings our hearts to weep

WikiPsalm #Nine

DCG

Epiphany in the Awakening of a Soul

http://thundergodblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/206a1-cemetery_sculptures_20.jpg

What triggers the soul to hunger?  Is it when our appetite becomes awakened by some defining experience we align ourselves with?  Do we control this mechanism or is it something innate and inborn within us?  Is it serendipity that connects us at the right place and the right time to events we become attracted to and enthused by?

Where do our deepest desires originate?  How do they germinate and then suddenly spark when some experience in our lives brings them to life?  Some creative passion born into possibility or some inspiring moment that changes us forever after that day forward has challenged many psychological, religious, and philosophical theorists for answers.  It is not that we choose these moments, but rather that these moments seem to choose us.  These moments influence something within our being and awakens us to a new possibility, a new experience that taps into something very deep within us.  We cannot explain it precisely even after many years of reflection, but it is something that transpires within us along the course of our lives.  It was not something we expected to engage us, and we certainly did not plan it.  Clearly one can see countless examples of this influential dynamic in our lives.  Weaving its imprint on those at the wake of discovery within the advancements of science can be demonstrated by Issac Newton’s quote …”If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants”.  The case for how artistic expression stimulates and perpetuates newer forms can be demonstrated by Bob Dylan’s influence on a generation.  He was influenced by Woodie Guthrie, and Dylan in turn influenced everyone from The Beatles to Jimi Hendrix. The same principle applies to the many other pursuits within the conduct of human expression.

Why there is so much diversity in the world, why there are so many different perspectives gives us some sign that we all form different types of connections to these defining moments that we want to align ourselves with.  The emotional connection to these events that forever changes our lives can lead us to completely different outcomes.  On one hand they can transform our lives into something that we will build upon and cherish for years to come, (a relationship with someone, a passion for a creative pursuit, a pleasurable pastime we enjoy, or another bonding relationship we can experience such as devotion and religion).  On the other hand it can lead us into a very dark realm of existence such as an emotional, and physical connection to some addiction, cult, or false prophet.

Some of my strongest connections originate from these awakened passions and desires.  Something resonated deep inside of me and I wanted to be part of these newly discovered feelings or ideas.  Either inspired by something or someone, I used whatever was in my power to get from point A to point B even if I didn’t know really where to start or how to get there.  Even when it meant that I was unsure of just where point A and point B really were in the first place, I effectuated this connection with determination! It may be that the awakening that is experienced is very subtle or its occurrence may be very intense depending on the circumstances met.  It may slowly transform us over time, or it may suddenly come into focus defining itself through a series of experiences that we progressively clutch and embrace.  However this mechanism manifests or however this animating principle becomes active, it seems clear that our belief systems, and our emotional attachments are crucial in their actualization.  The emotional connectivity to the animating forces behind our enthusiasm may truly be the glue that binds us to these desires.

I can certainly say that this was not the case for many occasional interests because I simply failed to follow through on them and develop them.  We can stifle many interests if we limit ourselves, if our insecurities creep in, or if others do not give us needed support or encouragement at times when maybe if that consolation was given at the right time, it could have changed the course of events within us.  I think that children have tremendous amounts of opportunities since their minds are not biased, since they have not yet learned the defeating attitudes we as adults often struggle with, and with proper encouragement they could become extraordinary people with cultivated dynamic skills if directed o do so at the right age.

Understanding the relationship of this phenomenon allows me to use this learning to better clarify worthy pursuits.  What leads me to ask these questions, I can only surmise.  These questions direct me to explore my fascination with my wish to better appreciate the world as I experience it.  I am my own person but influenced by many. The pragmatist within me speaks to make the unknown rational. The mystic within me seeks to make the unknown tangible.  The philosopher within me solicits the perplexity of the unknown; hence making the esoteric….exoteric!

 

 

Angel, Cemetery, Sculpture, Angel Figure