Forgiveness

I say this all with sincerity

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

A narcissist with an inferiority complex

It is a horrific thing being in between

A non-empathetic father

With a low self-esteem

Any one who grew up in this family

I share your pain

I’ve spent the better part of five decades

Searching for answers to keep me sane

Don’t get me wrong

I’ve had a good life

But nobody should have to endure

Such an existential strife

Sometimes I’m haunted by my dreams

But I do not claim to be a victim

I’ve educated myself

And this is my dictum

Make good memories

To replace the ones that harm

Over time these new ones

Will be a healing charm

Maybe this is a poem

Maybe this is my therapy

Maybe this will help others

I say this all with sincerity

…

DCG

The solution of humanity

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

I’ve thought quite a lot about myself

And the path I am on

The struggles I manage

When will this ugly duckling become a swan?

I’ve studied human behavior

And the history of philosophy

Influenced by the world religions

Looking for a perfecting ideology

I look for solace

To ease my mind

When thinking too much

On things of the troubling kind

There is strength in your weakness

Knowing sometimes you must bend

Like a reed in the wind

Or when we make amends

The problem of wisdom

We do not practice what we preach

Sometimes it is not in our grasp

And outside our reach

The power of forgiveness

The solution of humanity

A way to spare ourselves

And a way to keep our sanity

DCG

Post realization lament

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Why must we torture ourselves?

With guilt and shame?

The miracle of forgiveness

It is our upadana that we must tame

We can bond to our appetites

Or any maladaptive behavior

Be mindful of this truth

Or be mindful of your savior

We have the ability to overcome this suffering

Yet we fail to correctly act

Part of the human condition

Part of a natural fact

We are creatures of habit

Most people operate on the limbic system and react

It’s the higher neo-cortex

We must keep intact

Ancient wisdom or modern psychology

Where do you place your trust?

Which sources are accurate?

Which sources are just?

…

DCG

Not all is what it seems

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

What is possible May not be probable

What May feel good May not be good

Not all is what it seems

As this should be understood

Your wisdom in life

Will be tested many times

What are the rules you live by?

What was the punishment for the crimes?

Adopt or learn a moral ethic

Something tried, tested, and true

Live by this code that you stand for

Make everyone know this is you

This task will not be easy

Mistakes will be made along the way

There is a reason we have forgiveness

The opportunity to make good on another day

You will not be forsaken

The losses will be fewer than the gain

Do not be fooled by the rhetoric

Much of which is in vain

…

DCG

From whom shall we hide?

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

If you kneel at the alter of your sin

And bow down to the path of your destruction

Than you must eventually face

A self imposed abduction

How many of us

Compromised our common sense?

Subdue our better judgement?

Just what side do you stand on the fense?

If and when you awake

Upon self-realization

A chance for change

With self-indignation

Light eviscerates darkness

Forgiveness will always atone

The highest form of love

Is that we are never ever alone

My brother once told me

The universe will provide

To whom will we seek absolution?

From whom shall we hide?

,,,

DCG

Life is too precious

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

I embrace the joy

When I see the things line up in place

Time spent together

Sharing the world as I look upon your face

Knowing there is no expectation

Knowing only these feelings that stand

Part of the uncertainty

Is built into the hand

I don’t rely on criticisms

They only detract from the moment

One can spend a lifetime

To that which is unspoken

That which is meaningful

Is better when it is said

Never leave the heart unopened

Never leave it only in your head

Life is too precious

Rejoice in what life can offer

Too many of us never act

We leave it in an unused coffer

…

DCG

Self-Reflection

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Self-Reflection

The razors edge

To better myself

I’ve made this pledge

The search to improve myself

On the lessons of my life lived

Can benefit me

On the perspective that it gives

Yet I’m chasing a ghost

When I dwell on the past

I no longer serve myself

As the cost is vast

You heal from wounds

Not by attaching to the grief

Reliving a memory over and over again

There is no relief

One must move forward

I must create a new me

Build upon a new foundation

On how I intend to be

…

DCG

Intend to become Professed

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

A life with the good and the bad

Forgive that which is broken

We must take all into account

Censure that which is unspoken

Awaken from your slumber

Another day is here

Get on with the work

There is nothing to fear

Learn to take control

Choose that which is best

Do not repeat the past

If indeed you want to attest

Break from the prison

From which you are in

Don’t relive the life gone by

The intellectual shackles from where you’ve been

The struggle is real

Learn from your unrest

Deliver yourself from disinterest

Intend to become professed

…

DCG

If and when one learns

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

It pains me to say

I struggle with my family

All those years ago

All of that calamity

It haunts me today

To make peace I have tried

Reminders of the past come out when I interact

Reopen those wounds when I have cried

We must keep in measure

The way we communicate with one another

Deeds will pass from way back when

Yet they will continue to fester if we place blame on the other

We must find find a common narrative

Closure is needed to come to terms

Ones that we can agree upon

If and when one learns

…DCG

No Meaningful Relationship that is True

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

You tell me to be more positive

But if you really listen to what I say

Even with my pain and suffering

My outlook is still pretty good at the end of the day

I know we are not close

A chasm of ambivalence I cannot hide

There is a distance between us

Because of this I cannot confide

It’s hard to open up

If you are not understood

And so I isolate

I did the best I could

The issue is not about loving

It’s more about the failure to connect

If you can’t care for yourself

Why should I expect you to protect?

Our family has not dealt with Alzheimer’s

But I can sympathize with those who do

This is what is most heartfelt

No meaningful relationship that is true

…

DCG