Psychology

For the answers you must demand

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Self discovery is often impeded

On how we self reflect

Where do we place our attention?

Just exactly what do we inspect?

You might observe what happens around you

You might only think about how it makes you feel

But if you don’t take ownership

You won’t move forward and heal

We will often hide from ourselves

Our ego and self-esteem we try to protect

What we don’t pay attention to

We will often neglect

To be honest is hard

To be honest to ourselves is even harder

Easier to fool yourself

And become a character martyr

Critical self appraisement

Is not necessarily bad

If the goal is to self improvement

Than this is a conversation that must be had

If you have internal conflict

With something you don’t understand

Look inward and start asking questions

For the answers you must demand

…

DCG

The journey of the forsaken 

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

The journey of the forsaken

As children, they learn to self soothe

After years of neglect

Predisposed to seek validation, forever having to prove

A forsaken child

A silent crime

The pain and suffering

They withhold the signs

Someone will break the cycle

Someone will break the chain

Some will hide away

Always having to endure the pain

When the most powerful human emotion

Is suppressed and shoved into a closed box

When you can’t express love

And treat your children like they have smallpox

Given the severity

You may have to self regulate

Trick your nervous system

In order to satiate

In the self-imposed prison we call trauma

We are the inmate and simultaneously the guard

Never knowing we hold the keys to the cell

And the keys to the yard

It might take decades

Or maybe some therapy

Before we unleash the Kraken

Into the social emotional sea

You may fear rejection

You may fear intimacy

You may shut out the world around you

You may avoid any reciprocity

Do you feel unworthy?

Do you feel shame?

Do you push away emotionally available people?

And then tell them that you are to blame?

Many never see their attachment style

Dismissive-avoidant, anxious- attachment, fearful-avoidant and the like

Many won’t climb the mountain of self reflection

Many won’t take this hike

Change is possible

We can recalibrate a deep trauma of emotional recovery

From pain to loneliness to forgiveness to courage 

Now it is only me that has to open up and see

…

DCG

Why are we so confused?

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

I know I have

Some deep childhood wounds

I’ve matured and overcome

But still hide some in an emotional cocoon

It was never so clear

Until I met a kindred spirit

A trauma bond attachment

Anxious versus avoidant is common, painful, powerful, that would mirror it

First I majored in psychology

Studied Leo Buscaglia and Dr. Wayne Dyer

Then I double majored in philosophy

Eventually, I discarded all the rubbish on the pyre

What I’ve learned was not from therapy or counseling 

I’ve learned from my relationships on my own

Thanks to careful observations

For which I am prone

I’m reminded by two individuals

One from philosophy, and one from psychology

The Buddha equates attachment to suffering

BF Skinner’s operant conditioning demonstrates an emotional neurology

A rat in a cage pushes a lever to get the reward of food

What emotional lever do we push for love and affection?

Why are we so confused?

When we cannot understand, what is love or what is rejection?

RSP

…

DCG

Is there a path to our subconscious?

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Can we better understand ourselves?

From our dreams that we remember?

Is there a path to our subconscious?

Where we can enter?

The Native American tribes

Known for the vision quest

They seemed to value the dreams

That they would invest

Cocaine addict Sigmund Freud

Wrote a book the interpretation of dreams

An outdated and unreliable psychology

And misguided as it seems

Those who take DMT or LSD

They say it extends the doors of our perception

Those who don’t

May give it a hard rejection

I was once well read in sleep and dreaming research

But that was over 30 years ago

So now I reflect on my own dreams

As I know only what I know

I think our minds will show us problems

In a hidden dream reality

Always trying to solve

The problem of subjectivity 

…

DCG

Time only lives in the now

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Time only lives in the now

It is ever-present in what we observe

There is no past

With exception to a memory that we reserve

We do not experience a future

With exception to prophecy

But even then

It is only a mental vision that we see

There is no linear time

The Taoist monk would say

Only effortless action

Wu Wei (Woo way)

We are limited beings

With a finite mind

Can we really conceive?

Of limitless time?

Hence the paradox

With only one solution

What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

They both surrender

This provides the resolution

The mind can play tricks on us

Thus was born philosophy

Just how much do we understand?

Given our own psychology 



…

DCG

Rupert Spira

https://youtu.be/LjDhov4p6Sg?si=f5UcKTw8x15iUkfr

It is not uncommon to misdiagnose our past 

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

It’s hard to gain any ground

When you confabulate

So in retrospect

You must question what you reflect and communicate

With every decade we ponder

The pros and cons of the emotional inventory spent

The more we regret

The more we lament

Growing pains are the by-product

Of reason and accountability

The price and the rite of passage

In our maturity

It is not uncommon to misdiagnose our past 

The motivation is not lost

But it is the result

When we find out the cost

The wisdom we seek

Will benefit us if we pay attention

Some memories may mislead 

Unless we have proper retention

Experience and practice

May dispel a memory

If one is in question

In our receptivity 

…

DCG

I self sabotage

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

When I have guilt

When I have shame

I self sabotage

That’s who I blame

I don’t feel worthy

I don’t feel sane

I self sabotage

That’s where I put my blame

Guilt is from choices I’ve made

Shame is from identifying with inadequacy

My father used to put me down

He put me down so masterfully

Abandonment issues

Little self-esteem

The child inside me

Has a diminishing dream

You see I’ve had difficulty in relationships

I had a difficult childhood

And with my low self-esteem

My cognitive dissonance stood

RSP

…

DCG

At least I gave it a shot 

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

When the mind is weary

It can become overwhelmed and confused

One must then use a counter balance

Before one can defuse

There is nothing wrong with confusion

If it forces you to think

Consider all sides

And be distinct

Sound mind and sound body

Common sense can balance the equation

Activate your intelligence

And confront the mind-virus invasion

Some of our problems take time to work through

Patience, reflection, and persistence

Is the prescription

In times of unsolved resistance

The Tao resolves conflict with Wei wu Wei

Zen resolves conflict; human suffering as attachment

Hence you cannot grasp and cling to your breath

One must always exhale for detachment

On the other hand

The Confucian is the pragmatist

Resolution is common sense

No need for the iron fist

The American surfer knows

How to escape a riptide

Surrender to the water current

And not to their own pride

The will imposes maladaptive behaviors

And maladaptive thought

When we fail, we say

“At least I gave it a shot”

RSP

…

DCG

We accept the love we think we deserve

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

Sometimes we must wrestle with ourselves

Sometimes we must wrestle with God

Sometimes it comes naturally

Sometimes we must poke and prod

In self-sabotage

We resign

Closing The doors of opportunity

We may otherwise possibly find

There Is drama in our relationships

There Is heartache and there is pain

With too much repetition

Resolution Is In vain

Learned helplessness

A very real thing

If beholden to this cycle

No happiness we can bring

You can build a wall around you

Numb your senses from the pain

Push away any future entanglements

You think maybe this will keep you sane

The breakthrough will come

When our most inner needs are met

There may be some risk

There may be some regret

The gift of forgiveness

We allow our soul to heal

Patience and courage are required

To allow ourselves to truly feel

We except the love

We think we deserve

Trust is king

I n the world we observe

The power of love and friendship

Those who care will easily see

The struggle that goes on inside you

From the person you secretly yearn to be

RSP

…

DCG

The instant karma we now re-acquaint 

~ DC ~ Leave a comment

It’s been four months since my last post

I’ve struggled with my sight but not with my vision

This inner sanctum I dwell with my thoughts

Only now a more reflective provision

I ponder and think deep 

About what I truly find real

When something is taken away

You care more about how you feel

Experience begets empathy

Wisdom comes with self-restraint

The folly of our misgivings

The instant karma we now re-acquaint

Life has many gifts

Take heart and seize the day

Love deeply and serve others

Take heed before it all goes away

…

DCG